Dancing in the minds eye

Well, The Devon Horse Show was a blast. Great meeting new people and having fun with people I sometimes only see once a year. It's a vacation every year. What I haven't done was let everyone else know its my vacation. And then can lead to people being upset. SO next year I will.

One of my requests on my bucket list was to be on the coach with Dr. Don during the cone competition. And it was fulfilled. It was awesome!!! And the only reason I know this man and his fabulous wife is because of my mom. And I got to be on the coach while in the ring of the Devon Marathon because I knew mom would be there and would be proud. She missed us. :( And I got to be on the coach while he won a very important class. I was honored!!
So I became a coach junkie as my one friend puts it!!

There was a lot of upset about my last blog. Regarding my family. And some felt like it was too much to share with everyone and some loved it. It gave me freedom and if I offended anyone please let me know personally or you can comment below, that's what it's for!!

Where things are now is I'm not speaking too my mom, brother or sister. At least not directly, through email and only in relation to mom.
This is new to me. I have always been pretty close with my one sister who lives here and I can't bare to even look at her, that's how angry I am. I'm usually not like this with them and frankly it's nice. I see it as a boundary. I have allowed them to treat me a certain way and now I'm done. In the middle of all of this is my mom and considering I haven't seen her or spoken to her since she left I cannot speak of how she's doing. I hear mixed reviews. I just want her to be safe and taken care of. Even if it means not being around me because I make her angry. I know it's not personal and I don't want to upset her.

"I wish you had a good man to take care of you" was said three times to me today.
What the hell is with that? It's now making me think. All of the men I've had haven't been good? I don't like men taking care of me? I get irritated with them? I can take care of myself? I'm not attracted to the good ones? The good ones are already taken?
So many things and I still have a conversation that there won't be one that loves me wholly and perfectly and I will love them back that way.

So I'm juicing again, only for three days this time. I wanted to give my body a break and get back into my old ways. I unfortunately fell back into some not so healthy habits!!
Day one -feeling pretty good. I noticed when something upset me I wanted to smoke or drink or both!! Geesh, I'm such an addict!!

Oh an I got to gallop a 2yr old colt today!! Soooo much fun!!

Dancing in the minds eye...

Cheers





I'm looking at what I'm attracted to in people. What are the qualities I admire and what I don't.